Podcasts

Episode 16

February 7th, 2012    38 Comments

Yoshi’s back! Dave intros the show. David Choe, Harry Kim, Saelee Oh, and special guest Asa Akira are in the studio. Joey is having diva problems again. This is the last show.

People have a hard time turning off their phones in the studio. Yoshi’s already asleep. The show is not as popular as we thought. Some of our fans really love the show. It makes Joey feel less alone in the world. Dave didn’t like Yoshi’s hat when he saw him in Vegas. Dave equates the kid on youtube who gets beat up to Yoshi’s childhood. Yoshi mistrusts Dave’s message. Dave brings Yoshi a new hat. Yoshi and his friends have money trouble. Dave talks about how his relationship with Sean Parker started. This leads to painting Facebook, the first office. Facebook does not sound like a good idea to Dave. Joey interrupts Dave’s story with his diva needs. Dave takes payment in stocks. Dave paints the new office and finds out a huge story was going to break. The story printed is inaccurate. Dave is richer than rich. biatch. Dave’s on the cover of the New York Times and now everyone wants a piece of Dave. Rich people are boring at spending their money. So Dave will spend his money in comics, cloning and then fucking himself, reenact Brewster’s Millions. In the 80s, that’s one of a few movies of white people messing with black people. Dave is going to buy the cheaper Congo. Dave is going to enact revenge on anyone who has ever been mean to him. Dave has a batcave with everything that batman has. Dave’s going to change the Simpsons and Seinfeld. Margaret Cho, David Chang, and James Iha are his body doubles. Dave is paying for that super rare treatment that takes the gay out of him. Dave was doing well without Facebook anyways. Dave talks about a time before Facebook when it was a joke. What it’s like being rich but being around normal people. Everybody Dave knows has contacted him. Dave gets propositioned to have a sex slave. Some people would rather be slaves than be poor. For Asa, it’s just a communist mentality. Dave offers a slavery option. Rich ugly women still have a hard time getting laid. It only works the other way around. Asa works out a lot and is always hungry. Dave is also a hungry person. He gets so hungry that he overlooks his pet peeves. It’s hard to do pro lapse movies. Asa can gape her asshole. Asa Akira has won every award possible for sex. Asa Akira’s Insatiable 2 is rapey and violent. Dave compares it to the Ryan Gosling movie Blue Valentine. She does double vaginal and double anal. Yoshi can’t watch porn that has someone he knows in it. Asa, like Hall and Oates, has gone as far as she can with her career. What’s next? Dave reached his goals in gambling. Porn is an addiction for Asa. Double anal can only happen organically. There’s an art to anal sex. Anal sex hurts in the beginning.

Yoshi wants to do a show about boxing. He’s traveling to do a comedy show. The whores in Indianapolis are the worst. Yoshi picks bad sports bets for Dave. Yoshi is a sex tourist. Hong Kong Tijuana is a strip club like no other. Dave puts her finger in a stripper’s asshole while she’s sliding on shaving cream on stage. Yoshi prefers Alita club because he likes nasty girls over pretty ones. Pretty girls are overrated. Yoshi prefers authenticity. Porn makes Asa’s life isolated. It’s lonely. The porn convention has shrunk which means that the business is shrinking. While Dave was at the porn awards, girls are getting fingered around him. Unlike any other award show, the girls scream, fight, and finger at the AVN awards. What will Yoshi and Asa do when the industry is disappeared? Porn is like high school. Being a white guy in Japan is like being a celebrity. The Japanese would not appreciate Yoshi’s comedy. Japanese comedy is like David Spade and Chris Farley. Dave is taking requests for money. Dave was just aggravating people when he wasn’t painting. Now he’s painting again. Not painting is like not being laid. All this annoying energy was built up. It was very important for Dave not to wake up before noon. Now he gets to paint anywhere and wake up in the afternoon with his friends. When Dave paints new places, he doesn’t want chicks, he just wants to paint with his friends. It’s the most gratifying feeling. Dave just paints but gets paid to do it. That in itself is gratifying. Joey is happy to see that Dave looks healthier after painting. Painting in public is like a stripper showing her naked body. It’s a vulnerable thing. It’s Dave’s therapy. Dave expresses what can’t be put in words in his painting. If Dave was a girl, he would be a prostitute. As a man, Asa would get fucked in the ass. It would feel better with a prostate. Joey had his prostate tickled in Japan. He has felt plenty of old prostates. Rectal exams are just performed without a need for it. Bidets in Japan has the best pressure. Does Dave’s bidet go as deep as Joey’s? It made Joey cum. Yoshi doesn’t want to pay extra for ass play. Are bottoms jizzing everywhere in gay porn? A customer at Yoshi’s porn shop would tell Yoshi there is a defective spot on his gay porn tape just to make Yoshi watch the whole thing to find it. The customer just wants Yoshi’s company. Dave goes to a porn store to watch porn in San Diego. While Dave is in midstroke, an old man comes into his booth and propositions him. Once again, Dave is very vulnerable. Dave had to squeeze through to get out. Those places are for gay men. We say our sad last goodbyes. Married people should not be on Facebook. Facebook is cited in 90% of divorce cases. Marriage works because the Facebook option was not there. Now the temptation is there when times are hard. Some couples give their Facebook and email passwords to each other. Dave dated some girls who had to play seduction games through text. Dave has done the same thing with his gay clients. If Yoshi found love, he would fall hard and trust his girl. It’s about trust. Prenups are unromantic. Saelee would never marry a guy just for money. Dave is offering money to help people’s romances.

Pics from the podcast.

38 Responses to Episode 16

  1. Clif says:

    Yes!! Welcome back yoshi!

  2. raze says:

    Why Dave.. WHY!!!
    One of my last rare joys in life and you decide to end it…
    Why is this the last show, by the way?

  3. raze says:

    How can I sign up to be your apprentice ?

  4. what says:

    i was so happy yoshi was back but this is the last show?!

  5. J guzzle says:

    Dope! Keep the show going!!!!!

  6. T says:

    WTF! I just found this and it’s fucking over. FUCK

  7. pascal says:

    Please keep the show going!

  8. evo says:

    you guys should at least do like 3 more shows. i feel like a lot of mother fuckers like my self are just now learning about this podcast. choe you rule i could listen to you talk for days.

  9. Matt says:

    If you are just now learning about the show.. You are shit out of luck because that’s probably the reason why they’re ending it cuz shit heads like you are going to find out about Dave and his work through that article and all this news buzz. With that being said, you guys are probably some of the radest fuckers on earth. Although you guys talk about some heavy shit that most people would never even imAgine haha.. Your guy’s honesty is so pure and vulnerable.. But the best part about it all is the you simply just don’t give a fuck! I love you guys and I know you already know this but I’ll still say it, don’t ever fucking change! Ever!

  10. Chris says:

    It’s not gay to bang your doppleganger…it’s just hard to find him.

  11. Trace says:

    Yo, I’ll totally take you up on that offer. As long as I can still take drugs and fuck shit up on xbox, I’ll take care of you and shit. Yeah, I live in Nashville so fly me where ever the fuck you are, and we can rape the streets with pure awesome dope drum solos. I don’t really care about money, so just make sure I don’t die, and we will be straight.

  12. louie says:

    NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    man, if you take away all last episode stuff, this was a solid episode. it won’t be the same listening to the upcoming 3 past podcasts knowing it’ll end.

  13. Zigigas says:

    If You Notice My Previous Comments You Would Notice That I Compared This Show To Howard Stren And Breaking Bad. I’m A Genius I’ve Been And Would Always Be A Fan Of The KGB Crew…

  14. Zigigas says:

    If You Notice My Previous Comments You Would Notice That I Compared This Show To Howard Stern And Breaking Bad. I’m A Genius I’ve Been And Would Always Be A Fan Of The KGB Crew…

  15. Zigigas says:

    Zigigas

    October 25, 2011 at 3:48 pm

    KGB EP 12 Felt like Breaking Bad, Howard Stern and ofcourse the beautiful secerts of third world countries…

    Reply

  16. Matt Kim says:

    No!!! We need another podcast of Dave’s experience at the howard stern show! Kim Jong Stern! Prince of all media, don’t go!!!

  17. KeeF says:

    Yo, David and all the others involved in this show, would love to hear some new shows, stories…. Love your shit bro, heard you on Howard…. You kick ass man, keep up the good work….You need to teach me your gambling strategies, im an hr and half from Atlantic City and would love to take their loot….. Peace and love, Peace and love….release the poison. If you got a minute email me if you can, wanna talk some gambling shit…. Peace, David Choe Stern (Prince of all Media)

  18. Keith from Philly says:

    Was this recorded in SF i can here the sirens in the background

  19. Keith from Philly says:

    No! LA Dumb ass :)

  20. Berklee says:

    I want to be serious about this for a second, this podcast didn’t just affect you. Its amazing to talk about this show with people I would normally never even get a second chance to talk to them. I think the best example of this is when I got James Jean to stop mid signature at his book signing just to talk about the show and when he would be on next. The concept of the show being over doesn’t just affect you. It affects everyone that listens to it and who ever is on it. Us listeners take our time listening to these. No one wants to see this end. We all love to hear all the stuff that everyone thinks. We just wish it would never end.

  21. chris cottrill says:

    love this show!miss you dave

  22. Kyle says:

    Awesome podcast! Love listening to you guys. So fucking real and organic. If you guys want a shit load of listeners why not put this on itunes? Thanks for the laughs

  23. Abuv_all says:

    Fuck all the faggots that say “It’s because of you new listeners, Dave is stopping the show!” Dave’s stopping the show cause new pussy is taking up too much time. He’s a superstar now, pussy is way more fun than jerking off talking about his childhood or what Yoshi did last week. Fuck, he was content with just misc.. Porn pussy, but now he’s getting model pussy and actress pussy… That’s like eating chicken everyday, then a mutherfucker gives you steak instead.. Of course you’re gonna say fuck the chicken!!! The show was great while it lasted.. Fuck the people that was there from day 1 to the people that just started listening.. Fucker just wants his life back!

  24. Anonymous says:

    You guys should try filming your conversations and interactions and putting that up on youtube. Upgrade from a radio show to like a laid-back talk show thing. I’m sure WAY more people would tune in, it’d be way easier to find and more people are aware of Dave because of his recent media exposure. Plus we’d get to see all the dumb shit Yoshi is wearing. Either way, great show, sucks it’s over.

  25. Charlie says:

    Dave,
    This is funny shit!!
    Keep going!!, what the hell else are you all going to do?
    I just happened to stumble on your podcast.
    Why the hell are you NOT on itunes?
    Seriously, dude, why don’t you get on Adam Carolla’s podcast to get
    the word out.
    Will be looking out for your latest exploits.
    Thanks for sharing!!

  26. Billy says:

    I have listened to every episode (except episode 15 because I was protesting Dave because he got Yoshi to quit) and this is the only episode where it finally felt harmonious. I feel like it was all building to just this episode.

    What a ride.

    Please have Die Antwoord on the show (if you don’t end it)…please god have them on.

  27. Leandro says:

    hey dudes, give it some more time so the show could become more famous , it just started ofcourse you are not going to have crazy numbers… just keep on doing it and youll see youll pick up more people… I have already turn people onto it and they love it. give it some more thought.. you guys are crazy and interesting… anyhow hope you guys come on again.
    laters.

  28. Oscar says:

    don’t end it. have more guests like Die Antwoord and other famous people. do the show from all over the world.

  29. Paul says:

    KGB is the best podcasts I have listened to before
    I have listened to all the episodes and it was sad for me to hear that it might be the last show

    I discover the show by listening to Dave on the Howard Stern show

    When I’m listening to your show I feel like I’m just hanging out with you guys. It’s nice because I work alone all day sometimes it’s a little lonely
    Thanks to all of you in the show for keeping it so real

    Please make more shows you all are great and I’m really happy Yoshi was back thank you very much for all you have done!

  30. Dave says:

    You guys should produce more shows, I love listening to it at work — definitely feels like hanging out with a buncha friends — shit is hilarious!

  31. S.H. says:

    Hey Dave,

    It’s pretty clear what your next step is, Korean guys doing porn!

  32. MoJack says:

    What the hell, man?! You get Yoshi back on and then cancel the podcast. Keep this thing going! This group has a lot more stories to tell. Besides the JRE, this is one of the podcasts I look forward to hearing.

  33. p says:

    give me the money please.. 20grand sounds great thnx.

  34. A.B. says:

    Fuck money, it is a means to an end, but really means nothing. It comes, it goes and can change you if you let it, but at the end of the day it’s not really important. (at least to me.) But, I don’t have much of it. So if you are serious about having lots of money, i’d love a painting. I could never afford one. Sure I have your prints and a few tshirts, but art lasts forever. Just throwing that out there.

  35. Pavel says:

    YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI! YOSHI!

  36. Peter o says:

    weird now hearing the end of kgb with the end of dvdasa now

  37. Florian says:

    Hey Dave I’m French/Canadian more French than Canadian don’t worry haha.
    I want to go in America ,when I travel I love to learn new skills if I come over Los angeles and I clean stuff and doing ennoying task ,can you teach me drawing and glambing?
    you said that you can give work for some monney but is better to learning skills cause the monney gone not the skills and also this two activity are in my bucket list.
    see you soon and in case you never answer have a nice life :)

    ps : I just try we never know

Leave a Reply to Anonymous Cancel reply

Your email address will not be published.

You may use these HTML tags and attributes: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <cite> <code> <del datetime=""> <em> <i> <q cite=""> <strike> <strong>

PODCAST ARCHIVE

DIRTY HANDS | Order DVD | Watch Trailer

Award winning documentary, Dirty Hands: The Art and Crimes of David Choe is out and now it's available on DVD and iTunes!

Order the DVD, with over 3 hours of bonus footage here.

RENT (US $3.99) or BUY (US $9.99) from iTunes.     Launch iTunes  -   More info

Like Dirty Hands on Facebook

More info about Dirty Hands

DVD



Video
Thumbs Up Episode 1.1

The trip begins. David Choe hitchhikes his way across these United States.

Thumbs Up Episode 1.2

Yermo to Las Vegas.

Thumbs Up Episode 1.3

Gambling in Vegas.