Yoshi’s back! Dave intros the show. David Choe, Harry Kim, Saelee Oh, and special guest Asa Akira are in the studio. Joey is having diva problems again. This is the last show.
People have a hard time turning off their phones in the studio. Yoshi’s already asleep. The show is not as popular as we thought. Some of our fans really love the show. It makes Joey feel less alone in the world. Dave didn’t like Yoshi’s hat when he saw him in Vegas. Dave equates the kid on youtube who gets beat up to Yoshi’s childhood. Yoshi mistrusts Dave’s message. Dave brings Yoshi a new hat. Yoshi and his friends have money trouble. Dave talks about how his relationship with Sean Parker started. This leads to painting Facebook, the first office. Facebook does not sound like a good idea to Dave. Joey interrupts Dave’s story with his diva needs. Dave takes payment in stocks. Dave paints the new office and finds out a huge story was going to break. The story printed is inaccurate. Dave is richer than rich. biatch. Dave’s on the cover of the New York Times and now everyone wants a piece of Dave. Rich people are boring at spending their money. So Dave will spend his money in comics, cloning and then fucking himself, reenact Brewster’s Millions. In the 80s, that’s one of a few movies of white people messing with black people. Dave is going to buy the cheaper Congo. Dave is going to enact revenge on anyone who has ever been mean to him. Dave has a batcave with everything that batman has. Dave’s going to change the Simpsons and Seinfeld. Margaret Cho, David Chang, and James Iha are his body doubles. Dave is paying for that super rare treatment that takes the gay out of him. Dave was doing well without Facebook anyways. Dave talks about a time before Facebook when it was a joke. What it’s like being rich but being around normal people. Everybody Dave knows has contacted him. Dave gets propositioned to have a sex slave. Some people would rather be slaves than be poor. For Asa, it’s just a communist mentality. Dave offers a slavery option. Rich ugly women still have a hard time getting laid. It only works the other way around. Asa works out a lot and is always hungry. Dave is also a hungry person. He gets so hungry that he overlooks his pet peeves. It’s hard to do pro lapse movies. Asa can gape her asshole. Asa Akira has won every award possible for sex. Asa Akira’s Insatiable 2 is rapey and violent. Dave compares it to the Ryan Gosling movie Blue Valentine. She does double vaginal and double anal. Yoshi can’t watch porn that has someone he knows in it. Asa, like Hall and Oates, has gone as far as she can with her career. What’s next? Dave reached his goals in gambling. Porn is an addiction for Asa. Double anal can only happen organically. There’s an art to anal sex. Anal sex hurts in the beginning.
Yoshi wants to do a show about boxing. He’s traveling to do a comedy show. The whores in Indianapolis are the worst. Yoshi picks bad sports bets for Dave. Yoshi is a sex tourist. Hong Kong Tijuana is a strip club like no other. Dave puts her finger in a stripper’s asshole while she’s sliding on shaving cream on stage. Yoshi prefers Alita club because he likes nasty girls over pretty ones. Pretty girls are overrated. Yoshi prefers authenticity. Porn makes Asa’s life isolated. It’s lonely. The porn convention has shrunk which means that the business is shrinking. While Dave was at the porn awards, girls are getting fingered around him. Unlike any other award show, the girls scream, fight, and finger at the AVN awards. What will Yoshi and Asa do when the industry is disappeared? Porn is like high school. Being a white guy in Japan is like being a celebrity. The Japanese would not appreciate Yoshi’s comedy. Japanese comedy is like David Spade and Chris Farley. Dave is taking requests for money. Dave was just aggravating people when he wasn’t painting. Now he’s painting again. Not painting is like not being laid. All this annoying energy was built up. It was very important for Dave not to wake up before noon. Now he gets to paint anywhere and wake up in the afternoon with his friends. When Dave paints new places, he doesn’t want chicks, he just wants to paint with his friends. It’s the most gratifying feeling. Dave just paints but gets paid to do it. That in itself is gratifying. Joey is happy to see that Dave looks healthier after painting. Painting in public is like a stripper showing her naked body. It’s a vulnerable thing. It’s Dave’s therapy. Dave expresses what can’t be put in words in his painting. If Dave was a girl, he would be a prostitute. As a man, Asa would get fucked in the ass. It would feel better with a prostate. Joey had his prostate tickled in Japan. He has felt plenty of old prostates. Rectal exams are just performed without a need for it. Bidets in Japan has the best pressure. Does Dave’s bidet go as deep as Joey’s? It made Joey cum. Yoshi doesn’t want to pay extra for ass play. Are bottoms jizzing everywhere in gay porn? A customer at Yoshi’s porn shop would tell Yoshi there is a defective spot on his gay porn tape just to make Yoshi watch the whole thing to find it. The customer just wants Yoshi’s company. Dave goes to a porn store to watch porn in San Diego. While Dave is in midstroke, an old man comes into his booth and propositions him. Once again, Dave is very vulnerable. Dave had to squeeze through to get out. Those places are for gay men. We say our sad last goodbyes. Married people should not be on Facebook. Facebook is cited in 90% of divorce cases. Marriage works because the Facebook option was not there. Now the temptation is there when times are hard. Some couples give their Facebook and email passwords to each other. Dave dated some girls who had to play seduction games through text. Dave has done the same thing with his gay clients. If Yoshi found love, he would fall hard and trust his girl. It’s about trust. Prenups are unromantic. Saelee would never marry a guy just for money. Dave is offering money to help people’s romances.