Episode 13

November 30th, 2011    22 Comments

the show starts off with bobby doing an impression of biggie smalls. bobby loves Christian rock because he loves the message of blind faith.

We just started airing our podcast, KoreanGoneBad, and while we recognize that there is still no point to the show, we are amazed to have 10,000 listeners. We can’t have a live show and need to edit things out for legal reasons because we don’t know how to act. The podcast creates a hyperreal space for us as friends to talk in.

It seems that Yoshi is angry at Dave and we discuss why he refuses to show up. Issues of age and respect come up between Dave and Yoshi. Dave does not ask Yoshi to some things because of Yoshi’s incorrigible behavior. For example, Yoshi tells nigger jokes and hooker jokes to Jason’s parents. Yoshi shows up to events uninvited anyways while his feelings are still hurt. Dave finds he cock blocks himself on the show when his lady friends call him out.

Dave professes his love to sex workers. Bobby’s shy girlfriend, Carol, answers questions about her sex life uncomfortably with one word answers. She reveals what she wants from Bobby, more noise and to cum on her. In her relationship, Carol wants more fights with Bobby.

Joey looks great and recovered well from his divorce. His ex-wife of 12 years is getting engaged and he attributes his recent anger to that. His sexuality is flourishing after his period of heartbreak. When finding out about his ex-wife’s engagement, Joey weeps profusely but without facial expression. Joey can now fuck without falling in love. Joey reads Huckleberry Finn to dark women, each with one of his balls in his mouth. Joey’s fetish is getting his balls sucked. Joey scares a date away by wanting to stare into her eyes for an hour. Bobby can’t agree to have Joey watch him have sex with Carol, for therapeutic reasons. Harry lives in the land of despair with Joey after his break up after 5 years. Now Harry is fucking again. He loves to fuck now while his ex-girlfriend complained about not having enough sex. Dave’s answer is you always fuck because you’re a man.

Bobby pusses out and leaves to go sleep. Joey and Harry can’t have sex when their relationships go bad. When Joey was 18, he hit a girl over the head with the Bible while fucking her doggy style. Joey takes part in an orgy and doesn’t fuck but stares into a man’s eyes. Joey goes to a second orgy and still doesn’t fuck anybody. Joey and Harry talk about sharing the same girl but it gets complicated trying to work it out.

After going through the steps of bro code, Dave meets a new classy lady friend through James. Joey says, “If you have to ask, don’t do it.” Wasted sex is rotten fruit. Dave’s friend cockblocks himself. Girls who don’t get laid because they have too high standards become rotten fruit. Dave literally gets cockblocked by a giant penis on a trampoline. Is cockblocking really funny? Joey is ok with it because Yoshi cockblocks him in a funny way. Dave is more upset than Joey. Joey now has a manipulative bitch living with him. For Joey, this is crazy bitch training. She walks around the house bottomless to entice Joey. Joey and Dave are callous to a woman’s tears. A powerful woman sees men as children. You could never take what a man says seriously.

It’s hot. People are stripped to their underwear. Saelee is the man when she dates. David Choe is mistaken for the celebrity chef David Chang. Both Davids are going on a worldwide gambling eating tour. As a child, David used to shave his knees and his cheeks. Now he has hairy knees and cheeks.

Jason, David’s friend and Jenny, David’s ex-lover, are now and item and have arrived on the podcast to be interviewed about their relationship by David. Jason also follows bro-code. David gives his blessing because the feeling of infatuated love is precious because it is fleeting and rare. David asks them how they deal with the temporal nature of love’s honeymoon stage. Saelee is sick of their PDA. Saelee and Dave debate on Dave’s real feelings whether he really cares or not. David points out that Saelee is a hater. People cover up their awkwardness with laughter and Joey’s presence. Jenny’s ex-boyfriends are creeps. One wants to have group sex and a sex video. She doesn’t trust him enough. Jenny gets pleasure from a finger in her ass not because of sexual pleasure but because it scratches her hemorrhoid. At age 17, Jason loses his virginity to a 46 year old. At age 23, Jason’s girlfriends are ten years older. Jason spits knowledge that communication and compromise are more important in a relationship than love. We read off the list of traits for Jenny’s dream man and if Jason measures up. Jenny’s desire to have a child along with her biological clock complicates things. Jenny farted on everybody including David’s dick. Saelee has a list also. People fuck like how they eat and eat how they like to fuck. Dave’s video idea about singing dicks and clits. The difference between a three way for a guy and two girls and a girl and two guys. For the guy it’s a dominance thing, for the girl it’s a logistical thing to fill more holes. What would a three way with David, Jason, and Jenny be like? David has seen all modes of Harry’s penis, his boner and balls and everything, so he would be a good threesome partner. Jenny’s fantasy is to have three guys to fill all her holes. She would choose David and Jason, but it’s a toss up between Harry and Joey. Jenny scrubs Joey in a bathtub while he has a boner. We have a 15 year old kid staying over at the warehouse and Jenny shows her tits.

Pics from the podcast.

22 Responses to Episode 13

  1. jtang says:

    I-I-I-I dont know why you don’t edit out the st-stu-stuttering dude.

  2. anon says:

    It’s great to hear ye talking about the show finally. This show has actually helped me out a lot in ways. It’s hilarious, but the honesty ye have has really helped me through some stuff I’ve been going through. Keep it up please.

  3. nuttin honey says:

    some nice moments to this episode but joey needs to learn to seriously just shut the fuck up

  4. anon says:

    The show wouldn’t work without showbizowitz.

  5. PJ says:

    Sorry to burst your bubble KGB but you don’t have over 10,000 fans. Just 5 fans that have listened thousands of times.

  6. louie says:

    damnnn, 4 hours! not complaining though!

  7. Steve says:

    Lucky 13!

  8. Kim BoomBoom says:

    Some funny moments… I miss Yoshi. :’(

    Respect your 형!!!!

    Oh yeah, how about some fan appreciation, Dave, you fag. We love this show and we want to be a part of it more.

    Horny Kim for President!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2012!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

  9. trevtrev says:

    Stop fucking eating all the time gross assholes! :)

  10. Angelo says:

    You guys are awesome! Discovered you after hearing you on Howard Stern and you totally rock.
    I listed while I’m at work or in the car and it’s the most honest open talk that I’ve ever heard.
    I hope that you don’t stop the show anytime soon!! Keep up all the honesty and stories.
    Love all of you!!

  11. kiel says:

    fuck kurtzman – annoying guy

  12. p says:

    yoshi u were right she is a bit retarded. not mentally but her persona… penis

  13. i think im the first black fan!! haha … i gotta Wild youTube channel that i do! so whenever KGB gets its own channel on satellite radio(which i GUARANTEE is gonna happen) i wanna audition for my own show on the KGB channel…. check me out when you guys get a chance>>> http://www.youtube.com/user/2centsnow/videos

    • Harry Kim says:

      You will never work with us, not because the show is now cancelled but because you’re a nigger.

      Everyone knows all niggers steal and these mics aren’t cheap.

  14. Pavel says:


  15. John says:

    Thanks for the podcast. Gets me through the day. Thumbs up was great!

  16. Anonymous says:

    holy fuck those chicks are so fucking annoying who cares if it’s a fucking story my god every second of kgb has been pure entertainment until they talk im crying irl my penis is hard what do i do

  17. Anonymous says:

    rosebud :L

  18. janet says:

    i was looking for the real kgb and i found this. can’t say i’m disappointed, but are you guys affiliated at all with the REAL kgb?????????

  19. david says:

    i just love that this is still here.

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