Episode Synopsis:
the show starts off with bobby doing an impression of biggie smalls. bobby loves Christian rock because he loves the message of blind faith.
We just started airing our podcast, KoreanGoneBad, and while we recognize that there is still no point to the show, we are amazed to have 10,000 listeners. We can’t have a live show and need to edit things out for legal reasons because we don’t know how to act. The podcast creates a hyperreal space for us as friends to talk in.
It seems that Yoshi is angry at Dave and we discuss why he refuses to show up. Issues of age and respect come up between Dave and Yoshi. Dave does not ask Yoshi to some things because of Yoshi’s incorrigible behavior. For example, Yoshi tells nigger jokes and hooker jokes to Jason’s parents. Yoshi shows up to events uninvited anyways while his feelings are still hurt. Dave finds he cock blocks himself on the show when his lady friends call him out.
Dave professes his love to sex workers. Bobby’s shy girlfriend, Carol, answers questions about her sex life uncomfortably with one word answers. She reveals what she wants from Bobby, more noise and to cum on her. In her relationship, Carol wants more fights with Bobby.
Joey looks great and recovered well from his divorce. His ex-wife of 12 years is getting engaged and he attributes his recent anger to that. His sexuality is flourishing after his period of heartbreak. When finding out about his ex-wife’s engagement, Joey weeps profusely but without facial expression. Joey can now fuck without falling in love. Joey reads Huckleberry Finn to dark women, each with one of his balls in his mouth. Joey’s fetish is getting his balls sucked. Joey scares a date away by wanting to stare into her eyes for an hour. Bobby can’t agree to have Joey watch him have sex with Carol, for therapeutic reasons. Harry lives in the land of despair with Joey after his break up after 5 years. Now Harry is fucking again. He loves to fuck now while his ex-girlfriend complained about not having enough sex. Dave’s answer is you always fuck because you’re a man.
Bobby pusses out and leaves to go sleep. Joey and Harry can’t have sex when their relationships go bad. When Joey was 18, he hit a girl over the head with the Bible while fucking her doggy style. Joey takes part in an orgy and doesn’t fuck but stares into a man’s eyes. Joey goes to a second orgy and still doesn’t fuck anybody. Joey and Harry talk about sharing the same girl but it gets complicated trying to work it out.
After going through the steps of bro code, Dave meets a new classy lady friend through James. Joey says, “If you have to ask, don’t do it.” Wasted sex is rotten fruit. Dave’s friend cockblocks himself. Girls who don’t get laid because they have too high standards become rotten fruit. Dave literally gets cockblocked by a giant penis on a trampoline. Is cockblocking really funny? Joey is ok with it because Yoshi cockblocks him in a funny way. Dave is more upset than Joey. Joey now has a manipulative bitch living with him. For Joey, this is crazy bitch training. She walks around the house bottomless to entice Joey. Joey and Dave are callous to a woman’s tears. A powerful woman sees men as children. You could never take what a man says seriously.
It’s hot. People are stripped to their underwear. Saelee is the man when she dates. David Choe is mistaken for the celebrity chef David Chang. Both Davids are going on a worldwide gambling eating tour. As a child, David used to shave his knees and his cheeks. Now he has hairy knees and cheeks.
Jason, David’s friend and Jenny, David’s ex-lover, are now and item and have arrived on the podcast to be interviewed about their relationship by David. Jason also follows bro-code. David gives his blessing because the feeling of infatuated love is precious because it is fleeting and rare. David asks them how they deal with the temporal nature of love’s honeymoon stage. Saelee is sick of their PDA. Saelee and Dave debate on Dave’s real feelings whether he really cares or not. David points out that Saelee is a hater. People cover up their awkwardness with laughter and Joey’s presence. Jenny’s ex-boyfriends are creeps. One wants to have group sex and a sex video. She doesn’t trust him enough. Jenny gets pleasure from a finger in her ass not because of sexual pleasure but because it scratches her hemorrhoid. At age 17, Jason loses his virginity to a 46 year old. At age 23, Jason’s girlfriends are ten years older. Jason spits knowledge that communication and compromise are more important in a relationship than love. We read off the list of traits for Jenny’s dream man and if Jason measures up. Jenny’s desire to have a child along with her biological clock complicates things. Jenny farted on everybody including David’s dick. Saelee has a list also. People fuck like how they eat and eat how they like to fuck. Dave’s video idea about singing dicks and clits. The difference between a three way for a guy and two girls and a girl and two guys. For the guy it’s a dominance thing, for the girl it’s a logistical thing to fill more holes. What would a three way with David, Jason, and Jenny be like? David has seen all modes of Harry’s penis, his boner and balls and everything, so he would be a good threesome partner. Jenny’s fantasy is to have three guys to fill all her holes. She would choose David and Jason, but it’s a toss up between Harry and Joey. Jenny scrubs Joey in a bathtub while he has a boner. We have a 15 year old kid staying over at the warehouse and Jenny shows her tits.
FINALLY!
I dont even need to listen, the synopsis has all I need.
I miss Yoshi.
dave,
you mentioned in this episode a missing portion of your book that was edited out. my thought is why not make a sticker of the missing art and sell the sticker. people who want it will purchase it and stick it in the blank part of your book. i know i would.
cheers
Thank god, now I have something to keep me awake at work.
Seriously tho, I appreciate the honesty in your show. I hope even with 10K listeners, you guys will still keep it real and not backoff and keep being fearless in showing your true self
And…
Yoshi needs to bring one of his escorts to the show
Not entirely sure why the show is so unrelentingly fascinating. Maybe it’s because sex talk is never far from Dave’s mind and there’s something sexy about putting super-shy Asian girls on blast as regards their sexual preferences (even though I do think Joey particularly was putting words in Carol’s mouth).
SO MUCH is talked about in every episode that I really need to stop the podcast and comment on that segment while it’s fresh in my mind and then come back later for subsequent comments. The anecdote about Joey reading Huck Finn to a duo of testicle-sucking black chicks is off the charts in kinky misogyny. Todd Solondz will probably steal this for a future film. And JUST as crazy is Joey laying in bed next to a black woman as her husband comes into the room and fucks her while peering deeply into Joey’s eyes. Or Joey stroking a girl’s hair while she got fucked by someone else. This is literally a BRUNO routine from the Ali G show (maybe on the DVD extras, can’t remember). But Bruno goes to an orgy with these rednecks and after getting a redneck guy to show him all sorts of absurd sexual positions, he then watches the guy have sex with some slag and keeps telling the guy to look deeply into his eyes and keeps touching the guy’s leg and patting him on the head until the guy finally snaps and tells him he’s not into some “fag shit” and to leave him alone. The freaky thing is that is a Sasha baron Cohen SKIT and Joey’s crazy shit is real! Joey may be the weirdest self-loathing nerdy Jew on the planet.
PS. Whoever said “we should film this shit” was right. Ever hear of a video podcast? It really helps to see the people talking and there’s visual gold in Harry casually peeing while sitting down with the bathroom door open. Were you kids raised by wolves?
Man, I thought Jenny sounded really sexy and I was totally willing to finger her ass (even if it was just scratching an itch for her) until she revealed that she’d “farted on everybody in the room” at some point and Dave corroborated with his hilarious (and disgusting) anecdote about her unloading on him while they were naked-spooning.
High on her list was a guy with “Asian manners” and yet her Asian manners include ruthlessly farting on people (major turn off…good luck to JJaw who sounds too catatonic to ever really care).
PS. Between Dave, Joey, and Saelee, there was a lot of fucking screaming (and the resulting mic distortion) which is most unpleasant for anyone listening. Excitement=good screaming into the mic=bad…happy medium to be found.
mmmm donuts..
Damn, Saelee was fucking annoying, with her screaming at the top of her lungs and talking incoherently, she made it very difficult to listen to the podcast. Also, Saelee and Jenny’s voices sound very similar, so I couldn’t quite tell who was talking when, which also made it very hard to follow along.